Betwixt curse and gift

I say goodbye
but I don’t really feel
you’re fully gone
down that path
I can’t follow, yet

I said hello
to you for all those years
when your black doom
beckoned you
away down the road

I had hoped I
would be able to learn
what I could of
you, your art
while ever I could

So much not learned
so many things not said
Feeling that I
wasn't "it"
wasn't adequate

I’m grateful yet
I’m still learning from you
hearing echos
of times spent
together, apart

Grieving began
with the curse being found
But gifts live on
in mem’ry,
my heart and my voice